Sunday, February 19, 2012

         I wanted to start this blog 2 weeks ago, so I would have 1 blog per week but as always...I had run into some technical difficulties.  I am in no way, shape, or form Internet or computer savvy. 

          To start things off, many of you reading this know me, but maybe not to the degree you are about to know me.  I am 26 going on 21 years old.  I say that because I definitely don't feel like I'm just a few years from 30.  I steel feel like a teenager most of the time.  I feel young because I try to laugh as much as possible.  I thoroughly believe one of the main reasons the Good Lord put me on this earth was to encourage others and keep folks smiling.  I crack jokes all the time and most of that time...the jokes are about myself.  I've become quite good at it.........but.....its no bueno for my soul.  I am married to a gorgeous Latino man......(yeah you guessed it...he's the Mexican...I am not)  I am pretty sure God just ran out of tan paint when he knitted me in my mother's womb because I love all that is Mexican.  From the food, culture, language, land, ....and my husband.  He is my rock and support system. He is the one who has challenged me to step up and take care of myself. We have been together almost 9 years and married almost 1.   I thank God everyday for that man. 

         I have always struggled with my weight.  But even when I say that, I cringe.   I look at pictures of myself when I was younger, you know when all girls think they're fat, or when all girls make each other feel like they're fat.  AND I WASN'T FAT!!  I wasted many years thinking that.  However , now, I am fat.  I am 321 pounds.  (Ewww...did I just say that out loud?)  I recently saw my doctor and nutritionist for a full evaluation.  Since I was 14 years old, I was diagnosed with an underactive Thyroid.  So that alone is like a wall to climb when it comes to losing weight.   I am not diabetic and my blood pressure and cholesterol are doing OK.  My doctor couldn't understand that......she said girls alot younger and skinnier me have higher blood pressure than I do.  That made me feel good.....not for their sake but mine.  I equate that to laughing all the time.  There would be alot less blood pressure medications if y'all would just laugh more!  Obviously my age and weight are a concern.....medically, personally, and though my Gorgeous loves me......I know he is worried about me too.

 So here we are.........two weeks since I've started my healthy journey/new way of looking at food.  I must say......time seems to stand absolutely still when you don't get to eat all you want when you want.  Tomorrow will be 2 weeks since I had any form of soda (pop, coke, cola, what have you) and so far that has proven to be my Everest.  It's around me all day, every day.........calling to me.  Its sugary, carbonated, ice cold deliciousness taunts me all            day            long.      But...I have resisted.....thank you Jesus!  My nutritionist has me on a meal plan similar to the Atkins diet.  So I have been munching on veggies around the clock and eating as much chicken as I can afford.  Life is kind of crazy right now so I haven't ventured out to making dinners again......just small portions to eat.  I love to cook and I havent figured out how to cook healthy yet.  I hit the gym about 2-3 times a week........although I need to bump that up to 4-5 times.  I will be getting a personal trainer in the next few weeks....and I could not be more terrified.  I am probably one of the cheapest people you'll ever paying for that is almost as scary as actually doing the work. 

        But everything worth anything in this life, is never easy. WHICH I HATE.   So as I continue on my journey, blogging it for the world to see........I am eager for this change.  I am awaiting the day I can look in the mirror and not immediately say "GROSS"  Cuz I do do that.  Actually I avoid mirrors as much as possible.  I look forward to carrying my babies in my belly and actually being healthy.  I look forward to seeing that gleam in my Gorgeous's eyes when he is proud of me and thinks I am smoking hot!  (Well more than I already am.  LOL JK)  The list goes on and on but these are on my top right now. we go.......week 3 and full throttle.